Amp Squad and the Taking On of Labels

Over the past ten years, I’ve accumulated a few LGBTQIA labels - Asexual, Aromantic, Agender… I remember a time when the A stood for ‘ally,’ and I still encounter arguments on the internet about it meaning any and all of my labels. In more recent language, the list stops at Q… which used to stand for ‘questioning,’ but is now generally listed as ‘queer.’ According to some, ‘queer’ being an umbrella term for nonbinary and gender-queer identities, but depending who you talk to, the umbrella could be even bigger. There really can’t be one list that defines all sexual/gender identities because there are so many, and while some might try to use LGBTQIA+ and queer as synonyms, not everyone is comfortable with the queer label.

On the one hand, it’s just easier to say that I’m queer than to explain my assorted labels. It’s easier to say that I’m a queer sci-fi writer and that I write queer characters. Although the word was one used as a slur, language evolves, and (some) modern Pride movements have reclaimed the word, and use it as a positive affirmation. I’m part of a Queer Sci-fi community, and have grown accustomed to calling myself a queer sci-fi author who writes queer characters. Also, given how much in the minority my particular identities are, sometimes it’s just easier to say queer. It simplifies the conversation.

Last year, I wrote about my journey to accepting the trans label, because technically agender falls under trans, whether I feel trans or not. And the thing about labels is that they are personal. You don’t have to accept a label just because someone else thinks you fit in that box. (I wrote a screenplay about this a few years ago.) Part of being queer is realizing the labels you were born with (or the ones assumed to be default) aren’t the right ones for you.

Which brings me to Amp Squad. I debated with myself over whether to use this title, because in Ship Whisperer, the Amps didn’t like being called ‘Amp.’ Tabitha would use it for herself, but respected that others like her were more sensitive about the label, which was shorthand for “amputee.” Three of the five amputees did not advertise their missing limbs, and in the story, I deliberately did not address which limb(s) they were missing.

In Amp Squad, I develop a new terminology for those with super powers: Amplified Power Individuals. The characters appreciate the API terminology, because it shifts the focus from their missing limbs to their growing powers. It also gives the term ‘Amp’ an alternate meaning that they can latch onto with pride. The reclaiming of the word is a slow process, explored internally by the team as they test the label. The bigger battle for them it reminding the military that APIs are not soldiers. They are civilians… except for the main character, Tabitha, whose loyalty to the military is constantly challenged by their treatment of the APIs.

Labels are tools. They are a shorthand to describe something complex with a single word. But words have power — to unite, to divide. Take your word power, and use it for good.

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PRE-ORDER YOUR COPY OF AMP SQUAD TODAY!

 

Nothing to Prove - From Apathy to Agender

 Last year, I released a book called The Qinali Virus, featuring an asexual aromantic character, because I wanted to see people like me represented in fiction. In this future society, gender isn’t assumed or assigned at birth. Children use neutral pronouns unless they express a desire to be otherwise. In one of the scenes, my main character Amber says she wishes she’d kept her neutral pronouns. It’s a passing thought for her, but this character was very much a reflection of me and I started looking at my own relationship with my gender.

I’ve been “cis-apathetic” for much of my life. I never felt like a girl, but I also knew for sure I wasn’t a boy. The nuance of nonbinary identity wasn’t part of my vocabulary, so apathy set in. I dissociated from my body. I remember feeling very out of place as a woman in science, because ‘woman’ wasn’t part of my identity. It was just a happenstance.

 

After writing The Qinali Virus, I figured out I was agender. I was very insistent on that label, because other labels seemed to imply the existence of gender, and I have none. It took time to accept that “not cisgender” means trans, because I didn’t feel trans either. I think it’s partly because society trains us to think and recognize trans along a binary. If you’re not girl, you must transition to boy. So it’s very confusing for the nonbinary, genderqueer, gender fluid, agender, and everyone else whose resting point is not on the binary or even on the so-called spectrum. I also felt that if I were going to be trans, then I had to do something to prove it, like change my name and pronouns. 

 

Which brings me to Ship Whisperer – the story of a nonbinary explorer who discovers she has the ability to talk to spaceships. It’s mentioned a few times that she is nonbinary, and early beta-readers even commented that it was easy to forget, because she’s not using neutral pronouns. But you know what? That’s just fine. She doesn’t have to change her pronouns to prove she fits the category. The phases she went through to find her pronouns aren’t part of this book, but she found them.

 

I’m not a woman. I often think of changing my name and my pronouns, but whether I do or not, it won’t prove or disprove my trans-ness. I’m agender, and saying it is enough.

Ship Whisperer comes out October 14! Pre-order now!

I knit because of sci-fi

I hate knitting.

No really. I'm very project oriented, so I'll buckle down and get it done to complete the project in my head. I'm amazed at the process of knitting, how I can just make knot after knot and suddenly have a hat. I feel accomplished for what I produce. But the process itself grates on my nerves.

I'm not great at knitting mindlessly. It requires my full attention. So I can't be listening to podcasts or audiobooks while I do it. I recently looked up left-handed knitting, and it made a lot more sense to me. I think maybe if I practice that, I'll get into a better rhythm, but I'm so used to right-handed knitting that I'd get turned around in the middle of a row. I'm very slow at it.

Also, knitting really rubs against my minimalist mindset. I don't like clutter. I don't like having all these finished projects lying around my house. I seriously don't need that much stuff in my life. I have this issue with all my craft projects. I love the act of crafting. I hate having to store the finished products.

So why do I knit?

Well, it started with a Jayne hat. It was kind of an icon in the Firefly fandom, and a friend of mine was a super-huge fan. (She worked hard to convert me.) Anyway, I decided to learn to knit in secret so I could make her this hat. I went on to make many more Jayne hats, and now you can buy them commercially. Back then, you needed a friend who was a knitter. I was that friend. Once, I even orchestrated a food drive called "Jayne hats for turkeys" and I sent out many hats to people who donated to their local food banks.

That's how it started. 

Where it stands now... 

Well, I was writing Ship Whisperer, and my main character Tabitha thought she could pay more attention during meetings if she had something for her hands to do. Like knitting. (I've seen this work for other people. For me, it's a very effective way to completely tune out a meeting.) As she started to struggle with a cable knitting patter, I thought "I want to learn how to cable knit." So I dug up some knitting needles and decided on a project.

The last time I avidly knit, I identified as cisgender, heterosexual. That's not the case anymore. So I chose some ace and agender themed colors (purple, green, black, white, gray). 

For the cable knit pattern, I chose arm warmers. Arm warmers are small, and fairly simple if you decide not to add a thumb hole. I discovered there's an issue. I have TWO arms! So after working the first miracle, I had to then replicate it.

I then moved onto a hat, for which I wanted vertical stripes. Vertical stripes are non-trivial, but I adapted a pattern and... such were things.

So now, I have a book, a pair of arm warmers, and a hat. And a ton of leftover yarn. 

SHIP WHISPERER

Maybe one day I'll find knitting relaxing. Maybe Tabitha will as well. But I love how her random thought of "maybe I should try knitting" not only turned into a wonderful character arc, but also a fun side project for me while I was finishing the story.

Ship Whisperer comes out October 14, 2021! Check www.valeriejmikles.com for details.

Hope for Tomorrow - The Inspiration for "Premonition"

 The New Dawn series started as a screenplay, then a series of novellas that I workshopped, stripped for parts, and expanded into novels. In the expansion process, I realized that the first half of Book 1 had a different villain than the second half, and the draft was split into two: The Disappeared and Sequestered. That’s why the first four days of the two books overlap.

About half way through writing the first book, I got terribly stuck with my characters, and so I did something that always made me happy. I made a fanfic. You see, by this point in the process, I knew my characters very well. I had two full novellas, I had scenes from multiple books slowly filling up files in a google drive. I had the whole series plotted. And yet, I was stuck.

And so I wrote a story called “Festival of Pairing.” I wrote it as a fan fiction of my own work. In fanfic, you don’t have to introduce the characters or explain the world. You just write the story because the audience already knows it. In a matter of weeks, I produced the nearly complete first draft of Premonition, the story of Hawk meeting and rescuing his Prince. The story of Danny and Sky getting past their inhibitions, of Tray and Saskia deepen their love, and the story of Amanda finding hope that her future wasn’t lost. "The Festival of Pairing" was the first fully drafted book of the series, and I decided to slide it into the 7^th slot, where I think it fits beautifully.

The story has evolved significantly since that first draft, but at the heart of it is the power of hope. The hope that there are those in the world that love us, and that tomorrow will be better than today is a driving force.

The culture the crew encounters in this story is struggling to keep their population up, and homophobic sentiments permeate the culture. Same sex couple keep to the shadows, they’re bullied into false marriages to keep up appearances, and sometimes they’re beaten or killed. When I wrote this story, I was still very new to queer cultures and identities. I was still transitioning from closet ally into a confident one. I worried my books would be rejected because they had queer characters, and I hadn’t even come to realize my own queer identity yet.

I thought about evolving the story and removing the homophobia subplot, but just because I have evolved in thinking doesn’t mean the rest of the world is there. Acknowledgment and acceptance were important steps for me to take, and this story is like a time capsule looking into a fear that I am now past.

I didn’t set out to write a story about two parents learning to accept their queer child. I set out to write a fanfic. A sci-fi adventure with a cast that I loved in a world where supernatural things seem to happen all around them. But the hope for tomorrow comes in the love and acceptance of others. There’s power in everything we do, and you never know when your hello is someone else’s hope for tomorrow.

*~*

PREMONITION
COMING DECEMBER 5^th

AVAILABLE FOR PRE-ORDER NOW 

 

Seeing the future is not the same as saving it.

When the first premonition hits, Amanda thinks it’s a hallucination. She doesn’t have psychic power; she echoes the powers of others. Her sudden ability to see the future has done little to help her crew prepare.

Can Amanda’s borrowed powers give the crew the edge the need?

 

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